she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
