Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Randomize
