it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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