Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize