sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
