i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
