He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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