just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
