Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
