Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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