I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
