..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
