She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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