I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I don't deserve a penis
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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