just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
