Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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