oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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