am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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