It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
