Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
