So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Randomize
