So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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