lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
