3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
