Too much gin, very little bucket
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
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