I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
