I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
