only if we run a train.
done.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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