Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
