My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
