We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
