69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize