Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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