Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
