I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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