thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize