I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
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