Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I'm at about main and main street
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize
