it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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