Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Randomize