never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
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