i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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