She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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