i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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