Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
