He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
my being single is dangerous.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
