never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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