Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
