Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
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