I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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