I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
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